Blogging My Pain Away

Image says. “My head feels heavy and confused with all these thoughts and feelings on sexual abuse spinning around inside of it.  I know where to put these.  On my blog where other Sexual Abuse Survivors can see them too.  Now my head feels clearer.

Apathy Towards Child Pornography

I just read this post #JohnGrisham

This is my comment on that post

Great comments on Child Pornography, #JohnGrisham and apathy towards child pornography.

These are the tweetables I collected from that post

“Mr. Grisham this is 2014, we no longer believe it is acceptable to abuse children, sexually or otherwise.”

“Grisham & it appears, some others exhibit a certain apathy towards those who view child pornography as apposed to those who produce it. ”

Domestic Violence and Religion

I just finished reading this post.  Should Women Knuckle Down To The Devil? (Domestic Violence Awareness) 

Survivor Artwork

Bellow is a collection of my survivor artwork on this blog.

Mia Thriver Avatar ~ Doodle by Mia Thriver

HOW TO REACT TO CHILD ABUSE

I just read this post HOW TO REACT TO DISCLOSURE

These are my comments.

Wonderful post!!! You are spot on, a child internalizes the reaction to their reporting! We do need to educate the public on how to react when a child reports.  People need to know how to react to child abuse.

Movie Oblivion

I just watched the movie Oblivion last night.  I have seen no better representation of what life is like waking up as an incest survivor.  What it is like waking up to oblivion.

Breaking the Silence of Suicide

I just read this post.  Why Suffering In Silence Causes Suicide 

Read all about it

I just watched this Emeli Sande – Read all about it (Lyrics)

These are the quotes I liked/ collected from this song.

Child Abuse Taboo

I just read this post “CHILD ABUSE OR CONFRONTING ABUSE – WHAT’S THE REAL TABOO?”

This is my comment.

Yes! This is an important topic! This needs to be talked about! My friend can talk about how she had a hard day because her tire went flat…. but I can’t say… “I had a hard day because I had a flash back”…. Taboo’s everywhere!

There is a strong Child Abuse Taboo, it is important we work past this as a society!

Believing Sexual Abuse Survivors

I just read this post  On being believed.  by Kaelyn Siversky

This is my comment on the post

What a beautiful post that was! Almost the whole thing was quotable! Thanks for writing it.

The topic of Believing Sexual Abuse Survivors is such an important topic!

Legal Problems when Reporting Sexual Abuse

I just read this post. Sued by My Parents For Exposing My Sexual Abuse.

 These are my comments

I connected with so many things you said!

Wow… I just suffered a similar difficult situation with my family. I am still trying to sort it all out. I just blogged about it. Retraumatized after Reporting http://miathriver.com/retraumatized-after-reporting/Thank you for your insights. This is just what I needed to read.

This is strange. She says “Facing my loss of control has actually set me free.” Is that how you fix it? “I may incur difficulties for it, but I’d rather face the pain of speaking out than the pain of staying silent.”

Quotes

This is a collection of the quotes posted on my blog.

When a person who is well liked and well-respected in the community is accused of horrific behavior that the community prefers not to believe. The perpetrator provides the community with exactly what it wants in order for it to look the other way. Believing that the complainant is “crazy” gives the community the excuse to marginalize the victim and the disclosure, all the while showing support to the “unfairly” accused offender. – Boz Tchividjian.   Doodle By Jeanine A Thriver

Retraumatized after Reporting

Retraumatized after Reporting ~Doodle by Jeanine A Thriver

Oh, Goodness… I think this may be a long blog post.  Which is not what I had planned.  But I want to tell the story of my reporting, and that will be long I believe.

She was a strong-willed, independent, fighter, thirteen year old Mia.  It feels weird to call my younger self Mia, because that is my pen name.  Months of concentration camp style controls did not break me.  Nothing broke me until my dad got the church involved.  But still after all those years, there she sat, determined, determined to report.

Life Demands A Lot

Lives crushing demands ~ Doodle by Jeanine A Thriver

I can not get out from under this.  What if life crushes me.  My life is crushing me now.  How do I win when life is crushing me.  What do I do when when life demands a lot more then I have to offer.

Emotional Problems

The solution to emotional problems. Become Perfect! ~ Doodle by Jeanine A Thriver.  Originally posted on my old blog MiaThriver.com

If I have emotional problems, I prove that they are right.  But I have emotional problems.  So what should I do?  Become perfect of course!

Details of Abuse

All those Pesky Details ~ Doodle by Jeanine A Thriver

Here is the problem with telling anyone you know the details of abuse you suffered.  Once they know some of the details they will automatically want to not believe them, it is too horrible to believe.  They can, and will, discount little details here and there saying they are not sure they believe all of your account.

Project Unbreakable

I am trying something different for Project Unbreakable.   Traditionally Project Unbreakable is photographs of survivors of abuse holding posters about their abuse.  Sometimes the survivor shows their identity, sometimes they do not.

I am a blogger and doodler.  I use art therapy to calm my nerves.  I post this art on my blog along with my thoughts on Sexual Abuse and Recovery at MiaThriver.com .  It seems fitting to draw my Project Unbreakable images instead of using the traditional photographs.  

I have created four doodles for Project Unbreakable instead of just one image.   After suffering a lifetime of abuse at the hands of my father it was hard to sum up the abuse in just four images.  These four images represent some of my trauma memories at different ages.

I am working on Thriving and taking back my life.  I am the only person in my family who broke free.  My mother and my sisters are still under the abusers influence.  They turned against me and back-stabbed me.  I lost my mother and all my sisters to my pedophile fathers influence.

I am now working on moving forward, and learning to Thrive.  I have broken free from my abuser.   I am still trying to figure out thriving.  It is not easy.  So  I keep persisting and I don’t give up.

Bright Animated Random Doodling

Triangle ~ Doodle By Mia Thriver, MiaThriver.com

Marginalizing the Abused

 

When a person who is well liked and well-respected in the community is accused of horrific behavior that the community prefers not to believe.  The perpetrator provides the community with exactly what it wants in order for it to look the other way.  Believing that the complainant is “crazy” gives the community the excuse to marginalize the victim and the disclosure, all the while showing support to the “unfairly” accused offender. – Boz Tchividhian

Sun-Compass Doodle

Sun Compass – This theme occurs a lot in my drawings. Is this a symbol of God, or the Lord? ~ Doodle by Mia Thriver MiaThriver.com

About Mia

Mia Thriver Avatar ~ Doodle by Jeanine A Thriver/ Mia Thriver

I am the survivor of Childhood Sexual Abuse and incest. The pedophile that abused me was my father. By my father, I was sexually abused (most likely for years, starting very young), mentally abused, emotionally abused, and spiritually abused. I was then brainwashed to believe that I experienced nothing but love and care, no abuse.

Art Therapy Trees

One tree drawn three different ways. Monochrome pen, multicolored pen, and pen and marker. ~ Doodle by Jeanine A Thriver

I have found that doodling calms my nerves and anxiety.    Doodling is art therapy for me.  I now carry around colored pens in my purse and a small sketch book.  Now I can break out and sketch when I want.

Psalm 27

This is such a beautiful song by Christene Jackman.  It introduced me to the wonderful Psalm 27.   The Cord Chart and Lyrics is found here.  Below are the lyrics.

Human Spirit

“The Human Spirit is stronger than anything that can happen to it” ~Doodle by Jeanine A Thriver

There were times I wondered… Where I wondered if my human spirit was strong enough.  When the pain of it all was so great I did not feel like I could get through it.

Safe Little World

My Safe Little World ~ Art Doodle by Mia Thriver

Dear Diary,

Do you know what I did today?  I stopped paying all my bills.  And took whatever money we could scrape together and bought a Winnebago .  We packed up anything we could in one day.  And then I loaded up my kids and my husband.  And I drove off.

Emerging from Broken

As sexual abuse survivors are we constantly finding our true self?
Are we constantly Emerging from Broken?

Brick Foundation Quote~ Doodle by Jeanine A Thriver. “A successful person is one who can build a firm foundation with the bricks others have thrown at them.”

Where Life Throws me off a Cliff

Where life throws me off a cliff. Just to see if I can handle it!?? Not my favorite moment! Tune in… Sometime in the future…. To see what I do next? And when will I figure it out?  ~ Doodle by Jeanine A Thriver

I lost something of my self in this whole process… Which can be good… Like a blank slate waiting to be remade…. But it does not seem to be that way….

Suppressed Trauma Memories

Suppressed Trauma Memories ~ Doodle by Jeanine A Thriver

Suppressed Trauma Memories are often misunderstood by survivors of trauma, society and professionals alike.  This misunderstanding can be seen in the article snip-it below.

Love Heals Traumas

“Courage isn’t having the strength to go on. It is going on when you don’t have strength.” Courage and Strength ~ Doodle by Mia Thriver

I don’ think there is any short cuts to healing.  Sometime when we get past the pain of healing we sum up the healing in phrases that sound good, and simple.  It seems we think to ourselves, if I could just impart this new gained wisdom to the next survivor down the path then they will not have to wade through the pain I just went to to understand this.  But that would be a short cut.

I believe there is really only one path towards healing and that is one of love, caring and understanding.

Introducing Me – A – Thriver

Mia Thriver Avatar ~ Doodle by Jeanien A Thriver/ Mia Thriver

Hello.  I have started a new blog.  When starting a new blog, why not use wordpress…  Sure… I can learn something new.

So I tried to think of a new name (Mia Thriver) that encompassed my focus. I love this new name, I love the focus on Thriving.